Jeremy
Molly pulled her scarf up a little tighter around her face as she turned into the icy wind. She was surprised to find no one behind her.
“Jeremy?” she called.
Her only response was the wind whistling in her ears. “Jer!” she called a little louder.
“Over here!” a voice came from the direction of the tree line and Molly began trudging back up the rocks. “I’m just tying my boot.”
She found where he was crouched in the dirt and exhaled in exasperation.
“Don’t put your camera down in the dirt, how many times do I have to tell you?” she said as she scooped the Canon off the ground.
He stood to meet her glare and snatched the camera from her gentle grip.
“Stop babying it,” he said rolling his eyes. “It’s not gonna catch a cold from the germs.”
Molly turned on her heel and headed back down the rocks to the half frozen lake, taking each icy step with delicate care.
Jeremy passed her, leaping from one stone to the next, unconcerned with his own safety, as usual. He picked up a pebble when he reached the shore line and pegged it straight down onto the ice. He picked up another and skipped it across the surface.
“Do you think the ice is thick enough to hold my weight?” he asked over his shoulder.
Molly was still carefully picking her way down the rocks.
“Jeremy I will kill you myself if you put a single toe on that ice,” she said.
“Marry me and I won’t,” he said, smiling.
Molly sat down on a rock and tucked her legs close to her chest. She covered her face with her own camera and pretended to adjust the focus.
“Shut up,” she said, smiling behind the camera.
“You sure?” he asked holding his right foot out over the ice.
“Not for a million dollars,” she said. She aimed her camera at Jeremy and snapped a picture. He looked like the teenager she had met in high school; sandy brown hair sticking out in all directions, windblown, and sporting a smile too big for his face.
He put his foot back on the ground.
“How about when we’re 23?” he asked.
“Sure,” Molly said, snapping another picture.
“That’s what you said about 22.”
“Yep,” she started laughing.
“And 21.” He shook his head, trying to keep a straight face, and picked up another pebble.
“I’m just saying, you’d look good in an apron,” he laughed.
Molly gasped dramatically and pretended to be offended.
“I say!”
Jeremy laughed and held up his hands.
“Sorry, I meant big boy pants.”
Molly stood and started down the rocky beach.
“Damn right you did,” she said.
It was almost dusk and and the temperature was dropping. The weather report predicted snow just after midnight, the first of the year.
“Let’s head back to the car, I want to get on the road before it’s dark,” Molly said.
“Can we stop at a rest stop on the way?” Jeremy asked. “I’m starved.”
Molly laughed, “Do you come any other way?”
“I have a fast metabolism.”
The pair picked their way across the icy ground, staying close to the edge of the lake.
Molly turned around to look at Jeremy, who had stopped several paces away to take a picture. He was crouched low on the ground, snapping away.
“Let’s go, Jer,” Molly said. “We need to pick up the pace.”
“Yeah, yeah,” he said, pulling the camera strap back over his head and standing. “Let’s go, what are you waiting for?”
Molly laughed and kicked dirt in his direction.
“Shut up,” she said, and began walking again.
They reached the edge of a trail and Molly leaned against the sign post, catching her breath.
“Hurry up, man, what the hell?” she said.
“I’m coming, I’m coming,” Jeremy said. “Where’s the fire, speed racer?”
“I’m not kidding, stop moving so slowly,” she said.
Pulling her self upright, Molly started up the trail, taking even breaths as the incline increased. The sun was almost gone and she pulled out her flashlight. As she walked she thought about the first time she talked to Jeremy. They had both just turned fifteen, one month apart, and he was just the cute boy in her gym class who took the games really seriously and laughed louder than everyone else at his own jokes.
She had came in halfway through the period on a Monday, having had an emergency appointment with her doctor. She was still a little unsettled and declined the option to join in the floor hockey game. Jeremy, the gym class warrior, had already been penalized in overzealous attempt at recovering the small orange ball. He was sitting in the bleachers, cheering on his friends. His hair was too long and his white t-shirt was dirt stained and ripped at the collar.
Unable to help herself, she climbed the bleachers and sat right next to him. She just wanted to be near him for once.
“Skipping class, Molly?” he asked without looking away from the game.
“What?” she asked.
“That’s frowned upon in this institution,” he said, this time looking her straight in the eye.
“I don’t… How do you know my name?” She asked accusingly.
“I stalk you,” he said, very serious.
“Oh, okay,” she shrugged.
He smiled, the corners of his mouth almost literally reaching his ears. She smiled back, although she had stopped breathing.
“So what’s so important that you needed to miss your fine physical edumacation for?” he asked.
“I had a doctor’s appointment,” she said. “I have really bad an-” she stared at the clear blue of his eyes, getting lost in them and stumbling over her words. “I have bad anemia.”
“Bummer,” he said.
Molly nodded.
The gym teacher blew her whistle and the other students stopped in their tracks, everything suddenly still.
“Get out,” she yelled, and began pushing the nets to the far end of the gym.
The students laughed and in all of 20 seconds the gym was empty and Molly and Jeremy were left standing on the bleachers, in no hurry.
Molly was unsure of how to proceed, unwilling to walk away first. To buy a few seconds she pulled out her cell phone and checked the time display.
Without warning Jeremy snatched it from her hand and began typing on the small keyboard.
“Hey, I-” Molly stammered.
“‘I’m just gonna put my number in here,” he said. “Text me at exactly 9 AM this Saturday morning.”
“Are you kidding?” she asked.
“No, I’m entirely serious,” he said, smiling. “This takes the pressure off. Talk to you in a few days, bye.”
And with that he handed her phone back and started walking away.
“You’re weird,” she called after him.
“No, I’m Jeremy,” he called back without turning around.
“I know, I stalk you,” she yelled as he opened the door to the boy’s locker room.
“Okay!” he yelled back before waving and disappearing into the blue tiled unknown.
That Friday night she set her alarm for 8:59 AM.
Molly smiled as she remembered that day in school. At the time she had thought he would become her first boyfriend. After their first date, they were inseparable, but fate had had different plans. He became her best friend and they did everything together. They reached all their normal high school mile stones together, getting driver’s licenses and throwing up six glasses of rum and coke into Molly’s mother’s perfect hedges. He was her everything. Everything except her boyfriend, and she liked it that way, at least for now.
She had begun walking at a clip while her mind wandered so she slowed her pace. She didn’t hear any footsteps behind her and she stopped and turned again.
“Jeremy!” she called, annoyed. “What are you doing?”
Jeremy was kicking a beer can that had seen its prime long ago down the path. He began narrating an imaginary soccer game.
“Jeremy feigns left and kicks right, darts up the middle and HE SHOOTS HE SCORES!” He put his gloved hands to his mouth and exhaled loudly, imitating a cheering crowd.
“I swear,” she said, and headed forward again.
Jeremy was still a few paces back, but screw ‘em, she thought. She was thinking about the heater and seat warmer in her silver Volvo.
She plowed forward, checking the time on her cell phone. 10:47. How did it get so late so fast?
She turned to tell Jeremy to hurry up. He was at least ten yards away now.
“Jeremy, it’s already quarter of 11!” she yelled. “Hurry the hell up!”
He trudged on up the trail and Molly was too cold to wait for him. She needed to keep her body moving lest she succumb to what she could swear was the beginning of hypothermia. She shouldn’t be this cold, she needed to get to the car.
“Christ it’s cold,” she called, turning back towards Jeremy again.
This time she couldn’t even see him. She backtracked a few steps and swung her flashlight, finding her annoying target over fifty feet away.
“Are you trying to piss me off, Jer?” she yelled. “Because it’s working!”
“Holy crap, Molly, relax. You need to take deep breaths,” he yelled.
Molly stopped short. “What did you say?”
“You need to relax!”
“After that!” she was yelling at the top of her lungs now, he was still so far away.
She spun around, not waiting for an answer, and walked as fast as she dared up the trail. A few minutes later she checked her phone’s display again. 12:31 AM. She noticed it had begun to snow.
“That can’t be right” she said aloud.
She turned around, squinting into the darkness, focusing on the beam of light coming from her flashlight.
“Jeremy?” she called weakly.
She didn’t hear anything.
“Jeremy!” she yelled.
“Molly?” she heard his voice faintly in the distance.
“Where are you?” she yelled.
“I’m right here, Molly.” Still distant.
“I can’t see you!”
“Open your eyes, Molly.”
“What? What are talking about?” she yelled.
She felt a pressure her shoulder and she jumped.
“This isn’t funny, Jeremy!”
No response.
She stood as still as she could, listening hard. It was too quiet. She took off up the trail, her eyes searching for the parking lot. She should have reached it by now. Where did her flashlight go? She didn’t remember dropping it. Through her panic her breathing was shallow. She gulped at the air, lungs burning.
“Take deep breaths, you can do it,” Jeremy’s voice was in her ear now.
She halted and stumbled to a stop.
“Jeremy?” she yelled. “Jeremy where are you!”
“I’m right here, Molly.” his voice was gentle, like that of a father to his young child. “I’m right here, take deep breaths. Focus on my voice, find me.”
Molly spun in circles, squinting into the blackness. She slipped and hit the ground hard. Under her hands she felt something hard. Linoleum? She rolled onto her hands and knees and felt for her flashlight. She couldn’t see a thing, there was no moonlight.
She curled her legs into her chest and closed her eyes tight. She tried to remember all the breathing techniques her doctor had taught her to overcome her anxiety. She counted to five and breathed hard through her nose, then slowly exhaled from her mouth.
“That’s good, Molly,” Jeremy’s voice. “That’s good, do it again. Follow my voice.”
She inhaled again and rolled back onto her hands and knees, crawling in the direction of Jeremy’s voice.
“Good girl,” he said. “Good girl. Again.”
She inhaled again and opened her eyes. A light was visible up ahead and she crawled quickly, losing her breath again.
“Slow down, sweetie,” Jeremy said. “Deep breath. Now exhale.”
She exhaled and crawled toward the light, closing her eyes against the brightness.
“It’s too bright, I can’t open my eyes,” she said, covering her eyes. She was crying now.
The light dimmed and she heard the humming of fluorescents. All at once the air around her became warm.
“Open your eyes now, Molly. Open your eyes.”
Molly opened her eyes. Jeremy was squatting next to her on a white linoleum floor, his hand laid gently on her shoulder. Across the almost empty room sat a white bed next to a small, closed window. She was sitting up against a wall in the opposite corner, legs tucked tightly to her chest. Her winter coat was gone and something thin, soft and white took its place.
“Jeremy?” Molly whimpered.
“No,” he said sternly. “Doctor Abrams.”
“Doctor Abrams?” she choked out. “Where am I?”
Molly looked around the room in panic. Sketches and paintings hung haphazardly from every wall. One in particular, pasted in the very center of the wall above her bed, was of a boy with wild hair a wide smile, precariously poised over the edge of an icy lake, his right foot hanging over the shoreline.
“But, I…” Her voice trailed off.
She turned around, pulling her scarf up past her chin.
“Jeremy?” she called. Where had he gotten to, now? “Jer!”
“Jeremy?” she called.
Her only response was the wind whistling in her ears. “Jer!” she called a little louder.
“Over here!” a voice came from the direction of the tree line and Molly began trudging back up the rocks. “I’m just tying my boot.”
She found where he was crouched in the dirt and exhaled in exasperation.
“Don’t put your camera down in the dirt, how many times do I have to tell you?” she said as she scooped the Canon off the ground.
He stood to meet her glare and snatched the camera from her gentle grip.
“Stop babying it,” he said rolling his eyes. “It’s not gonna catch a cold from the germs.”
Molly turned on her heel and headed back down the rocks to the half frozen lake, taking each icy step with delicate care.
Jeremy passed her, leaping from one stone to the next, unconcerned with his own safety, as usual. He picked up a pebble when he reached the shore line and pegged it straight down onto the ice. He picked up another and skipped it across the surface.
“Do you think the ice is thick enough to hold my weight?” he asked over his shoulder.
Molly was still carefully picking her way down the rocks.
“Jeremy I will kill you myself if you put a single toe on that ice,” she said.
“Marry me and I won’t,” he said, smiling.
Molly sat down on a rock and tucked her legs close to her chest. She covered her face with her own camera and pretended to adjust the focus.
“Shut up,” she said, smiling behind the camera.
“You sure?” he asked holding his right foot out over the ice.
“Not for a million dollars,” she said. She aimed her camera at Jeremy and snapped a picture. He looked like the teenager she had met in high school; sandy brown hair sticking out in all directions, windblown, and sporting a smile too big for his face.
He put his foot back on the ground.
“How about when we’re 23?” he asked.
“Sure,” Molly said, snapping another picture.
“That’s what you said about 22.”
“Yep,” she started laughing.
“And 21.” He shook his head, trying to keep a straight face, and picked up another pebble.
“I’m just saying, you’d look good in an apron,” he laughed.
Molly gasped dramatically and pretended to be offended.
“I say!”
Jeremy laughed and held up his hands.
“Sorry, I meant big boy pants.”
Molly stood and started down the rocky beach.
“Damn right you did,” she said.
It was almost dusk and and the temperature was dropping. The weather report predicted snow just after midnight, the first of the year.
“Let’s head back to the car, I want to get on the road before it’s dark,” Molly said.
“Can we stop at a rest stop on the way?” Jeremy asked. “I’m starved.”
Molly laughed, “Do you come any other way?”
“I have a fast metabolism.”
The pair picked their way across the icy ground, staying close to the edge of the lake.
Molly turned around to look at Jeremy, who had stopped several paces away to take a picture. He was crouched low on the ground, snapping away.
“Let’s go, Jer,” Molly said. “We need to pick up the pace.”
“Yeah, yeah,” he said, pulling the camera strap back over his head and standing. “Let’s go, what are you waiting for?”
Molly laughed and kicked dirt in his direction.
“Shut up,” she said, and began walking again.
They reached the edge of a trail and Molly leaned against the sign post, catching her breath.
“Hurry up, man, what the hell?” she said.
“I’m coming, I’m coming,” Jeremy said. “Where’s the fire, speed racer?”
“I’m not kidding, stop moving so slowly,” she said.
Pulling her self upright, Molly started up the trail, taking even breaths as the incline increased. The sun was almost gone and she pulled out her flashlight. As she walked she thought about the first time she talked to Jeremy. They had both just turned fifteen, one month apart, and he was just the cute boy in her gym class who took the games really seriously and laughed louder than everyone else at his own jokes.
She had came in halfway through the period on a Monday, having had an emergency appointment with her doctor. She was still a little unsettled and declined the option to join in the floor hockey game. Jeremy, the gym class warrior, had already been penalized in overzealous attempt at recovering the small orange ball. He was sitting in the bleachers, cheering on his friends. His hair was too long and his white t-shirt was dirt stained and ripped at the collar.
Unable to help herself, she climbed the bleachers and sat right next to him. She just wanted to be near him for once.
“Skipping class, Molly?” he asked without looking away from the game.
“What?” she asked.
“That’s frowned upon in this institution,” he said, this time looking her straight in the eye.
“I don’t… How do you know my name?” She asked accusingly.
“I stalk you,” he said, very serious.
“Oh, okay,” she shrugged.
He smiled, the corners of his mouth almost literally reaching his ears. She smiled back, although she had stopped breathing.
“So what’s so important that you needed to miss your fine physical edumacation for?” he asked.
“I had a doctor’s appointment,” she said. “I have really bad an-” she stared at the clear blue of his eyes, getting lost in them and stumbling over her words. “I have bad anemia.”
“Bummer,” he said.
Molly nodded.
The gym teacher blew her whistle and the other students stopped in their tracks, everything suddenly still.
“Get out,” she yelled, and began pushing the nets to the far end of the gym.
The students laughed and in all of 20 seconds the gym was empty and Molly and Jeremy were left standing on the bleachers, in no hurry.
Molly was unsure of how to proceed, unwilling to walk away first. To buy a few seconds she pulled out her cell phone and checked the time display.
Without warning Jeremy snatched it from her hand and began typing on the small keyboard.
“Hey, I-” Molly stammered.
“‘I’m just gonna put my number in here,” he said. “Text me at exactly 9 AM this Saturday morning.”
“Are you kidding?” she asked.
“No, I’m entirely serious,” he said, smiling. “This takes the pressure off. Talk to you in a few days, bye.”
And with that he handed her phone back and started walking away.
“You’re weird,” she called after him.
“No, I’m Jeremy,” he called back without turning around.
“I know, I stalk you,” she yelled as he opened the door to the boy’s locker room.
“Okay!” he yelled back before waving and disappearing into the blue tiled unknown.
That Friday night she set her alarm for 8:59 AM.
Molly smiled as she remembered that day in school. At the time she had thought he would become her first boyfriend. After their first date, they were inseparable, but fate had had different plans. He became her best friend and they did everything together. They reached all their normal high school mile stones together, getting driver’s licenses and throwing up six glasses of rum and coke into Molly’s mother’s perfect hedges. He was her everything. Everything except her boyfriend, and she liked it that way, at least for now.
She had begun walking at a clip while her mind wandered so she slowed her pace. She didn’t hear any footsteps behind her and she stopped and turned again.
“Jeremy!” she called, annoyed. “What are you doing?”
Jeremy was kicking a beer can that had seen its prime long ago down the path. He began narrating an imaginary soccer game.
“Jeremy feigns left and kicks right, darts up the middle and HE SHOOTS HE SCORES!” He put his gloved hands to his mouth and exhaled loudly, imitating a cheering crowd.
“I swear,” she said, and headed forward again.
Jeremy was still a few paces back, but screw ‘em, she thought. She was thinking about the heater and seat warmer in her silver Volvo.
She plowed forward, checking the time on her cell phone. 10:47. How did it get so late so fast?
She turned to tell Jeremy to hurry up. He was at least ten yards away now.
“Jeremy, it’s already quarter of 11!” she yelled. “Hurry the hell up!”
He trudged on up the trail and Molly was too cold to wait for him. She needed to keep her body moving lest she succumb to what she could swear was the beginning of hypothermia. She shouldn’t be this cold, she needed to get to the car.
“Christ it’s cold,” she called, turning back towards Jeremy again.
This time she couldn’t even see him. She backtracked a few steps and swung her flashlight, finding her annoying target over fifty feet away.
“Are you trying to piss me off, Jer?” she yelled. “Because it’s working!”
“Holy crap, Molly, relax. You need to take deep breaths,” he yelled.
Molly stopped short. “What did you say?”
“You need to relax!”
“After that!” she was yelling at the top of her lungs now, he was still so far away.
She spun around, not waiting for an answer, and walked as fast as she dared up the trail. A few minutes later she checked her phone’s display again. 12:31 AM. She noticed it had begun to snow.
“That can’t be right” she said aloud.
She turned around, squinting into the darkness, focusing on the beam of light coming from her flashlight.
“Jeremy?” she called weakly.
She didn’t hear anything.
“Jeremy!” she yelled.
“Molly?” she heard his voice faintly in the distance.
“Where are you?” she yelled.
“I’m right here, Molly.” Still distant.
“I can’t see you!”
“Open your eyes, Molly.”
“What? What are talking about?” she yelled.
She felt a pressure her shoulder and she jumped.
“This isn’t funny, Jeremy!”
No response.
She stood as still as she could, listening hard. It was too quiet. She took off up the trail, her eyes searching for the parking lot. She should have reached it by now. Where did her flashlight go? She didn’t remember dropping it. Through her panic her breathing was shallow. She gulped at the air, lungs burning.
“Take deep breaths, you can do it,” Jeremy’s voice was in her ear now.
She halted and stumbled to a stop.
“Jeremy?” she yelled. “Jeremy where are you!”
“I’m right here, Molly.” his voice was gentle, like that of a father to his young child. “I’m right here, take deep breaths. Focus on my voice, find me.”
Molly spun in circles, squinting into the blackness. She slipped and hit the ground hard. Under her hands she felt something hard. Linoleum? She rolled onto her hands and knees and felt for her flashlight. She couldn’t see a thing, there was no moonlight.
She curled her legs into her chest and closed her eyes tight. She tried to remember all the breathing techniques her doctor had taught her to overcome her anxiety. She counted to five and breathed hard through her nose, then slowly exhaled from her mouth.
“That’s good, Molly,” Jeremy’s voice. “That’s good, do it again. Follow my voice.”
She inhaled again and rolled back onto her hands and knees, crawling in the direction of Jeremy’s voice.
“Good girl,” he said. “Good girl. Again.”
She inhaled again and opened her eyes. A light was visible up ahead and she crawled quickly, losing her breath again.
“Slow down, sweetie,” Jeremy said. “Deep breath. Now exhale.”
She exhaled and crawled toward the light, closing her eyes against the brightness.
“It’s too bright, I can’t open my eyes,” she said, covering her eyes. She was crying now.
The light dimmed and she heard the humming of fluorescents. All at once the air around her became warm.
“Open your eyes now, Molly. Open your eyes.”
Molly opened her eyes. Jeremy was squatting next to her on a white linoleum floor, his hand laid gently on her shoulder. Across the almost empty room sat a white bed next to a small, closed window. She was sitting up against a wall in the opposite corner, legs tucked tightly to her chest. Her winter coat was gone and something thin, soft and white took its place.
“Jeremy?” Molly whimpered.
“No,” he said sternly. “Doctor Abrams.”
“Doctor Abrams?” she choked out. “Where am I?”
Molly looked around the room in panic. Sketches and paintings hung haphazardly from every wall. One in particular, pasted in the very center of the wall above her bed, was of a boy with wild hair a wide smile, precariously poised over the edge of an icy lake, his right foot hanging over the shoreline.
“But, I…” Her voice trailed off.
She turned around, pulling her scarf up past her chin.
“Jeremy?” she called. Where had he gotten to, now? “Jer!”
